I feel like I should’ve felt worse that our flight to Kunming took off without Drama, a student acquaintance and the third member of our little troop who was going to accompany us half the way. But by the end of this tale, I hope the reason behind my blasé attitude, my shrug and sigh will make itself apparent.
Anyway, we knew she had a ticket on a flight the following day – I had booked it, after all – but whether or not she would use it was a question wrapped in the deepest of human mysterious, by which I mean drama.
In the meantime, our flight was fine and we managed to find our way onto the correct bus, which is usually the second major challenge after arriving at any foreign destination (finding baggage claim being the first major challenge and the restroom slightly less challenging).
But upon boarding we were met with an unusual amount of starring, or rather, an unusual manner of starring. I glanced around to make sure we were the intended objects before facing the starers again. One of the middle aged ladies began making gestures – something outside the bus…no, something in her hands? Our hands? I was confused. Then it hit me: this bus might require pre-bought tickets instead of cash. “Piao?” I said, a moment later. She nodded.
And so, using my vast vocabulary – which I retain externally in my phone for safe keeping – I was able to determine that the ticket booth was in the direction that a lady on the bus was pointing. This brief exchange cemented something in my mind, actually two things, come to think of it: 1) the word “piao” for ticket and 2) that a great way to memorize vocabulary is to learn it and then immediately use it while under mild to severe stress. Naturally, I wanted to test this new method by yelling a vocabulary word at James and then immediately dropping a small spider on his shoulder or shoving him off a short ledge. But upon reflection, I think that getting the person to use the word functionally is really key. So if there were a way to get him to yell spider in Chinese while…
Challenge #1.5 overcome!
Next challenge, get off at the correct stop. We passed this test with flying colors as well… possibly because the sign was bilingual but it’s hard to know since we’ve trained our brains to absorb content so quickly, particularly pictures. Final challenge: find our accommodations, the Upland International Youth Hostel. We accomplished this task not by showing a taxi driver the written address – how amateur – but by using our keen sense of direction…*ahem* supplemented by the GPS on my iphone.
It turned out to be the craziest maze of a building. Once we’d stumbled into our room and dropped our bags, we ventured back out for stroll around the new city.
One immediately noticeable thing about Kunming, in contrast to living in Dongbei (the north east), was the more relaxed vibe and the amount of foliage: both welcome. I’ve heard the former trait attributed to it’s being near Southeast Asia but I couldn’t say for sure. We had a nice little walk around a popular lake where we saw a (Buddhist?) man use body tension to break a brick, chop himself in the neck with a cleaver, and then wrap a pliable metal wire tightly around his neck, impressively, all without dying.
He then produced a little box and in exchange for their monetary contributions, people would receive a prayer bead bracelet. A little further down the path was a small group of middle aged men playing what looked like banjos, except for one man, who appeared to be playing a large leaf that made a high, wobbling sound like flute. I was impressed and immediately wondered where I might get my own leaf.
The next morning, Sunday, just after the sun rose,… Drama finally arrived. She seemed happy, possibly ecstatic, to be there – a first time traveler among fellow travelers. She immediately set about meeting them all and collecting their contact information. I realize the pseudonym probably seems unfair but I assure you, it was earned fair and square.
The three of us hired a taxi – with some negotiating – to take us to the Stone Forest. We’d intended to leave by 9:00am and take a bus but when we went to get Drama, we found that she had some things to do until around 10:00. So we hung out for an hour or two as an ominous feeling began to creep over us – or at least, over me. I began to recall the tangled heap of text messages that we’d exchanged in preparation for the trip causing my optimism to flicker ever so slightly. But then again, she did help us with the taxi. Maybe it was just me.
The Stone Forest is probably the premier place in China to see karst topography and was to be our introduction to Chinese National Parks. A Chinese friend told me once that when you go sightseeing in China, all you see is Chinese people. And that’s understandable considering their impressive population statistics. If you want to get a feel for it, just imagine a fairly crowded place you’ve been in the States – like the Superbowl or a McDonalds back when they were selling Tiny Beanie Babies. Now multiply that number by 5 and you’ll get the idea.
I’ll sum up the one side of this particular experience in this five-word impression: crowds, noise, expensive, touristy, and paved. Despite that, it was also a beautiful, well kept park with a nice amount of footpaths built in so that one could wander into solitude. There were a few cultural displays – the Miao people, if I remember correctly. And the concession stands were oddly charming, perhaps because the hottest item seemed to be whole cucumbers which meant that there were whole crowds of people munching on crisp cucumbers.
The rock formations were impressive – the largest had huge characters beautifully etched into them – and would have been even more so had there not been so many tour groups standing in front of them.
On the way back Drama did a lot of chatting with the driver and figured out a nice place to eat lunch. She figured out a lot of other things too: like where to get some local special bread next door and that mushrooms were in season. Once lunch was finished, we spent at least 30 minutes at Joy Bakery while she decided on the perfect gift for her parents (special food is a common gift and according to the box, a very “fashionable gift” as well). But at least the Yunnan duck was tasty.
As is often the case with fowl, they don’t cut the meat from the bones; they just hack it apart with a cleaver – which is probably a lot faster for the cook. Interestingly enough, the sauce that came with the duck reminded me of mole, the Mexican chocolate sauce usually put over chicken.
Unfortunately, all this shopping and eating apparently made the driver late for his shift change and we had to pay extra after he dropped us off at a restaurant… which probably made him even later. But our friend was adamant.
This is how we found out that deciding on what to eat would be more difficult than we had expected. It could have been the language barrier or cultural differences, maybe us, or it could have just been her but when she’d ask if we wanted a certain type of restaurant and we said we didn’t, she just kept asking us until we ended up at the front door. Shrug and sigh.
She preferred hotpot, we didn’t. Nothing against hotpot; it’s usually welcome. But since hotpot places tended to be hot from all the steam and we were already hot and sweaty from the park experience, we just felt ready for something a little more cool and refreshing (hotpot is just what it sounds like: they bring you a pot of spiced water, light the burner in the center of the table, and bring you raw ingredients to boil. The dipping sauce you mix yourself). She countered, saying that hotpot places weren’t hot and next thing we knew, we were being seated, sweat running down our faces the entire meal. Don’t get me wrong, though. It was still good food. Just a confusing experience and quite expensive.
We were only in Kunming for what amounted to two days, which wasn’t quite long enough but all the time we could budget. We used all the Monday we could spare to explore the neighborhood. On the whole, the it has more green and fresher air than our city even though it’s larger (about 10 million). And even though I saw hardly any foreigners walking around, people seemed to stare at us less, which was refreshing.
As an unrelated, though interesting side note, another local dish is called “crossing bridge noodles.” As the story goes, centuries back a dutiful wife was bringing her scholar husband dinner. On the way, while crossing a bridge, she tripped and all the items mixed together – the noodles, spices, meat, and vegetables. Like a polite husband, he ate it anyway and as it turns out, said it was even more tasty mixed together. A lesson for us all. Too bad goulash wasn’t so lucky.
Trip Log August 9, 2014, 9:00am Sunday
